My 6 year old starts hopping up and down while grabbing himself:
YS: "Mama I have a cramp in my weiner"
ME: "rubbing it will make it feel better"
*I did NOT just say that to my kid*
He runs to the bathroom holding his weiner
*Oh no, I did NOT just say that to my kid*
he returns butt ass neked
*I really did NOT say that to my kid*
YS: "Nevermind mama, I just hadta pee"
*huge sigh of relief*
ME: "glad to hear it kid."
ooohhh, I said that to my kid.
My prepubescent, preteen 11 year old
ME to ES: how was school
ES: "met a hottie on the activity bus home"
ME: "oh, who is she?"
ES: "dunno"
ME: "she doesn't have a name?"
ES: "dunno, but she's a hottie and she's in high school"
ME: "of course she's a hottie cuz she's in high school"
ES: "just cuz you're in high school doesn't make you a hottie mom"
ME: "she's too old for you"
ES: "but, I'm single mom"
ME: *blink*
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